CHAPTER FOUR: "I WAS ASHAMED SO I LIED AND TOLD MY DAD I WAS GOING TO LOOK FOR FURNITURE"
For some strange reason, between 1-2am I would find myself up thinking “I need to do something”.
At this point, I weighed well over 260 pounds, and my eating was completely out of control.
Not to mention that a majority of my money was being spent ON FOOD!
September 17, 2018 @2:13am, I finally registered myself to attend the Weight Loss Surgery seminar at New Jersey Bariatric Center (NJBC).
My seminar was scheduled for October 9, 2018.
I did not want to attend the seminar alone (again), so I asked my mom to accompany me.
Let me rewind while you have a seat at the feet of my heart.
Considering Weight Loss Surgery was something I was VERY ASHAMED of.
Getting the courage to speak to my mom about it was tough.
Back in 2017, when my mom and I went to the FIRST seminar, she asked “Are you going to tell Daddy?’.
I was truly ashamed and embarrassed and did not want my dad to know. I didn’t WANT ANYONE TO KNOW.
Embarrassment and Shame held me captive and I went into protective mode.
So I lied.
When my mom and I were on the way to the FIRST seminar with NJBC, I lied and told my dad that my mom and I were going to a furniture store to look for a new bed.
Fast forward to Oct 2018, my mom and I are on the way to the SECOND seminar and my dad calls.
My heart started beating super fast!
My mom whispered to me “Are you going to tell him”?
I told her that she could tell him.
We were sitting at the red light by the corner of my house.
I vividly remember looking down at my hands shaking on the steering wheel.
I listened and my mom proceeded to explain that we are on the way to a Weight Loss Surgery seminar.
Anyone who knows my dad, knows that he is super animated and loud when he is excited (Love you dad!).
I was awaiting his response with nerves sitting in the pit of my stomach.
I wanted to take my words back.
I zoned out for a second and remember “coming back to reality” when the car behind me beeped the horn.
I could hear his voice and NO HE WAS NOT ON SPEAKER PHONE LOL !
I heard him say to my mom “WORD?!!!! GOOD FOR HER. I’M SO PROUD OF HER. TELL HER I’M IN HER CORNER. ”.
*Total sigh of relief*…
And trust me when I say, that man has been in my corner EVER SINCE.
Okay now, fast forward….
My mom and I get to the seminar.
MIND YOU, this is the SECOND.
THE SECOND seminar we have attended.
The information was pretty much the same.
Per New Jersey Bariatric Center (NJBC), if I was going to consider Weight Loss Surgery again, I needed to attend a new seminar…. so there we were.
Their rules. Not mine.
I gave them my insurance card.
I slid it across the table with “Salt Bae Energy”.
I was cool as a fan cap this time, because I ALREADY KNEW I WAS COVERT!!!
My intake appointment with the surgeon was scheduled for Tuesday, October 23, 2018.
I walked out of that seminar with the Peace of God mixed with some olivia pope swag..
I was MORE THAN READY this time for the journey ahead and I KNEW it would be smooth sailing.